You’ve done the counseling, you’ve read every blog you can imagine, and you’ve worked on your issues. Still, you can’t seem to pull the trigger and ask your spouse for a divorce, because you think it would negatively impact your children and their mental wellness and leave them wishing you had stayed together. So, what is the best option – should you stay married or pursue divorce?
There’s no doubt about it: Having kids makes divorce trickier and there’s more heartache involved. One of the saddest realizations of splitting from your spouse is that you’ll no longer be able to see your children on a daily basis, that is, unless you have full custodial rights. This makes many couples ponder whether the better option is to stick together and continue to work at repairing their marriage, even after the wheels have long since fallen off and the relationship has crashed.
When Staying Married Does More Harm than Good
Parents who are unhappy in their marriage often engage in unhealthy habits and stop all attempts to revive what was once a happy union. Remember, though, that your children will not only see but sense the tension in an unhappy household. You may mistakenly believe you only argue when the children are not present, but you’d be wrong if you think your children don’t notice that you simply can’t get along like you once did. Children also learn and copy behaviors they see modeled by their parents, and if you’re constantly arguing or yelling at each other, what does that communicate to an impressionable child? What does it tell them about how to be a good husband or wife and effectively deal with conflict?
Handling Your Divorce in a Collaborative Way
So, you’ve decided to split up, after all, but you’re unsure if you made the right call. You may wonder if getting a divorce will scar your children psychologically, or the opposite, if it will help them be better off in the long-run. It’s important to know that the divorce itself doesn’t determine whether or not your kids will turn out OK, but rather the way you behave during and after your divorce. If you handle your split in a rational, mature, and collaborative way, it will indirectly teach your children the importance of putting their personal differences aside and how to reach effective compromises.
Contact Us at Cynthia Tracy, Attorney at Law, P.C. for a Consultation
Still unsure of whether divorce is the right option for you and your family? Attorney Cynthia Tracy can offer legal counsel and guide you how to have a smoother, less expensive, and less drawn-out divorce. Contact the law firm today to book your consultation and make a healthy, clean break.
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